We come into this life indebted. Not to be a downer, but having been given LIFE is a gift we can only give back with by distributing joyfullness and thankfullness to everyone we meet throughout our lives. The earth gives back ten thousand grains in return for each grain she has received. "One grain, ten thousand grains" is the biological law of this world. If you violate this law, you cannot live happily. If you cannot live by this law, you will be most unfortunate, "a man/woman punished and confined in the prison called 'sickness, misery or difficulties'." (Ohsawa)
You must become your own doctor. Your own teacher. (This is why we look in the mirror during class) Coming out of the fog that our comfortable, conditioning creates, is not easy. But no matter how you look at it, fight it, argue it, pay for it, beg for it, trade for it, NOTHING can help you heal, grow, change or achieve Self-Realization but YOU.
We don't FIND ourselves, we CREATE ourselves. The attitude you take before the action you take is of upmost importance. The attitude of gratitude will help you heal faster, attract abundance, and help you manifest your dreams more than any action done with the look of woe-is-me. The harsh news: It takes hard core discipline to keep your self in a state of gratitude. Much easier to complain and get stuck in the vicious cycle of negative self-dialogue, guilt and laziness. We become easily disillusioned, and addicted to our worry, our sadness and self-pity. The Good news: IT IS NEVER TOO LATE TO START FROM SCRATCH. Each moment we are given another chance to breathe, we can summon our will and start over... get back in the ring and go for our best life possible!
If you want real freedom and true Self-Realization, then seek a re-education of yourself and learn the Order of the Universe (they don't teach it in the public school system). Study what challenges your arrogance and habitual ways. Don't just seek the cure, seek the education that will align you with your innate wisdom and limitless power.
Blessings on your path,